Combat for Dummies: Murphy's Rules, Part III

-The problem with taking the easy way out, is that the enemy has already mined it.
-Never worry about the bullet with your name on it. Instead, worry about shrapnel addressed to 'occupant'.

-The enemy is anyone who is going to get you killed, no matter what side he is on.

-All battles are fought at the junction of two or more map sheets --- printed at different scales.

-All battles are fought uphill.

-All battles are fought in the rain.

-Logistics is the ball and chain of armoured warfare.

-Boldness becomes rarer the higher the rank.

-Never reinforce failure. Failure reinforces itself.

-Only 5% of an intelligence report is accurate. The trick of a good commander is to isolate the 5%.

-Tactics are for amateurs; professionals study logistics.

-When a front line soldier overhears two General Staff officers conferring, he's fallen back too far.

-It isn't necessary to be an idiot to be a senior officer, but it sure helps.

-No captain can do very wrong who places his ship alongside that of the enemy.

-Always know when it's time to get out of Dodge.

-Always know how to get out of Dodge.

-There are two kinds of naval vessels: submarines and targets.

-A lost battle is a battle one thinks one has lost.

-Surprise is an event that takes place in the mind of a commander.

-All warfare is based on deception.

-A little caution outflanks a large cavalry.

-If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will have more than your fair share to take.

-Perfect is the enemy of good enough.

-Mine fields are not neutral. They attack anyone.

-Your mortar barrage will put exactly one round on the intended target. That round will be a dud.

-The mortar team will always have the correct number of safety pins to prove they armed all the rounds. To ensure this, the mortar team carries extra pins.

-Artillery adds dignity to what would otherwise be a vulgar brawl.

-If at first you don't succeed, call for artillery.

-When artillery doesn't work, call for an air strike.

-Overkill works.

-When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy.

-Military intelligence is a contradiction of terms.

-If it flies, it dies.

-The buddy system is essential to your survival.  It gives the enemy somebody else to shoot at.

-Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.

-Radios will fail as soon as you desperately need fire support.

-Things that must be together to work usually can't be shipped together.

-The most dangerous thing in a combat zone is an officer with a map.

-There is nothing more satisfying than having someone take a shot at you and miss.

-If your sergeant can see you, so can the enemy,

-You'll only remember your hand grenades when the sound is too close to use them.

-Smoke and loud noise don't kill.  Only hits count.

-The faster you shoot the bad guys, the less shot you will get.

-If you can keep your head while those around you are losing theirs, you may have misjudged the situation.

Combat for Dummies: Murphy's Rules, Part II

-If your attack appears to be going really well for once, it’s an ambush.   

-The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

-“When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend.” --U.S. Marine Corps 

-If it's stupid but works, it ain’t stupid.

-Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you can't get out.

-A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.

-Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last and NEVER, EVER volunteer to do anything.

-The quartermaster has only two sizes: too large and too small.

-“Five second fuses [are guaranteed to] last three seconds.”  --Infantry Journal 

-You are not Superman (Marines and fighter pilots take note). 

-A sucking chest wound is Nature's way of telling you to slow down. 

-If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short. 

-Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder. 

-The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack. 

-No OPLAN ever survives initial contact. 

-There is no such thing as a perfect plan. 

-There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole. 

-A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping

-Friendly fire - ain’t. 

-Recoilless rifles - aren't. 

-Suppressive fires - won't. 

-Protective fire - don't. 

-Perfect plans - aren't. 

-The important things are always simple. 

-The simple things are always hard. 

-If you're short of everything except the enemy, you're in combat. 

-No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection.

-No inspection-ready unit has ever passed combat. 

-Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support. 

-When both sides are convinced that they are about to lose ... they are both right. 

-All weather close support doesn't work in bad weather. 

-The bursting radius of a grenade is always one foot greater than your jumping range. 

-The only terrain that is truly controlled is the terrain upon which you are standing. 

-The law of the bayonet says the man with the bullet wins. 

-The best tank killer is another tank. Therefore tanks are always fighting each other ...& have no time to help the infantry. 

-Precision bombing is normally accurate to within +/- one mile (...or so). 

-“Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground.” --USAF Ammo Troop 

-The side with the fanciest uniforms loses. 

-Armored vehicles are bullet magnets; a moving foxhole that attracts attention. 

-Expending material in combat is easier than filling out Graves Registration forms -- Ammo is cheap; your life isn't. 

-Just because you can't see the enemy, don't for a minute believe they can't see you. 

-When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy. 

-"Aim towards the enemy." --Instruction printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher 

-"A slipping gear could let your M-203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit." --Army's magazine of prevention maintenance 

-"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."  --U.S.  Air Force manual
-"Tracers work both ways."  --U.S. Army Ordnance 

-"Any ship can be a minesweeper....once." --Anon 

-"Never tell the platoon sergeant you have nothing to do." --Unknown Marine Recruit

 -"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him." --USAF Ammo Troop

-“Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons.” - Gen. MacArthur

-You, you, and you . . . Panic. The rest of you, come with me. (Marine Gunnery Sergeant)

Combat for Dummies: Murphy's Rules, Part I

-Have a plan. 

-Have a back-up plan, because the first one won't work.

-If you can choose what to bring to a gunfight, bring a big weapon and a friend with a big weapon.

-In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived and who didn't. 

-If you are not shooting, you should be communicating, reloading, and running. 

-In combat, there are no rules, always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose. 

-Use cover or concealment as much as possible. The visible target should be in FRONT of YOUR weapon. 

-Don't drop your guard. 

-Always tactical load and threat scan 360 degrees.

-The faster you finish the fight, the less shot you will get.

-Your number one Option for Personal Security is a lifelong commitment to avoidance, - deterrence, and de-escalation.

-Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun, the caliber of which does not start with a ".4."

-Never be the idiot who shows up armed only with a knife.

-Bring an automatic weapon.  Better yet, bring two.

-Bring all your friends, with all their automatic weapons.  Get them to bring their friends, with all of their -automatic weapons.    

-Bring lots and lots of ammo -- it's cheap life insurance.

-Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.

-Only hits count. Close doesn't count. The only thing worse than a miss is a slow miss. 

-If your shooting stance is good, you're probably not moving fast enough, nor using cover correctly. 

-Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral and diagonal movement are preferred.) 

-Accuracy is relative: most combat shooting is more dependent on "pucker factor" than the inherent accuracy of the weapon.

-Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours. 

-Decide to be aggressive ENOUGH, quickly ENOUGH.

-Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one. 

-Be polite. Be professional. But have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

-Watch their hands. Hands kill. (In God we trust. Everyone else, keep your hands where I can see them).

-When in doubt, empty the magazine.

-Someday someone may kill you with your own weapon, but they should have to beat you to death with it because it is empty.

-“If the enemy is in range, so are you.” --Infantry Journal 

-Incoming fire has the right of way.

-Don't look conspicuous: it draws fire.

-Teamwork is essential - it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at.

-"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you." --Infantry Journal

-Never share a fox hole with anyone braver than yourself.

-Anything you do can get you shot. Including, doing nothing.

-The easy way is always mined.

-“Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo” --Infantry Journal 

-Professionals are predictable - it's the amateurs that are dangerous.

-The enemy invariably attacks on one of two occasions:
a. When you're ready for them.
b. When you're not ready for them.

Or

a. when they're ready

b. when you're not. 

-If you can't remember, “Front Towards Enemy” really means “This side the heck away from you.”    

-Mines are equal opportunity weapons.